The Precious Prince - A Faerie Tale

Once upon a time, a travel-loving Prince and Princess dreamed of exploring the world, with her eager to see unknown places and him less so but willing to go along.

 

 

Although they are a dream team and know that compromise is the name of the game, they are troubled by Marie Antoinette and the current situation in their land.  The tiny pot of gold they've saved might turn into a pot of copper. Nevertheless, it's exciting and nerve-wracking. And the possibilities are endless. They are going to radically redefine retirement.

 

First off the bat was finding the perfect carriage. The gallant Prince set off at a steady pace and searched high and low. The word was out, and messages started pouring in from all over the kingdom. Fortunately, they’re living in a global village, and his search could be done at the click of a mouse. Soon Google became his best friend, and through the looking glass he found Gumtree. For 14 months, they fired up their faithful Ruby Coach and went in search of a robust workhorse.

 

 

Just before all hope was lost (he loves setting targets and time frames), they found their Isuzu. A fine Honey Badger. Tough, resilient, robust, and fearless.

 

The princess loves the Honey Badger, but it needs modification. The prince, who adores the princess, agreed and set out to renovate, revamp, and remodel the vehicle to suit their lifestyle, needs and expectations. The Princess immediately started making her own shopping list; the Prince almost choked, but remained perfectly calm when he reminded his beloved that they have a budget. He also broke the spell when he told her that believing in treasure-filled coffers is a fairy tale*.

 

 

It wasn’t long before cheers and good wishes poured in from all around. The couple is touched by their friends' enthusiasm, especially when the Earl of Porter Street passionately offered his help with the project.

 

 

This came as a great surprise, as the Earl is a most brilliant man. In all the Kingdom there isn’t anyone quite like him. He is clever, passionate, enthusiastic, determined, courageous, and immensely creative, practical, and positive. Why did he want to see the Prince, you wonder? This is no ordinary guy; he's an adventurer who has travelled the world by plane, train and automobile. His resume is as long as your arm: an inventor, winemaker, farmer, engineer (he was behind the cantilever of our famous bridge to the Huguenot Tunnel), musician and gentleman.  

 

 

The Earl offered to help with their project and wouldn’t take no for an answer. The Prince was so overwhelmed by this generous offer that he was speechless and got all choked up. You see, the Prince is often surprised and perplexed by kindness, and his emotions can get the better of him. He couldn’t believe his good fortune and was reminded to count his blessings.

 

 

Without a moment's delay, the Earl employed his two trusted employees, Hymie and Leon, to begin dismantling the vehicle. Armed with blowtorches, grinders and welders, they stripped the box in no time. Within the week, an opening was made from the box to the cab; all the panelling was removed; the “skirt” and guardrail were dismantled; and the tailgate clearance was modified.

 

 

The Earl and the Prince have regular meetings and, on occasion, sample their favourite tipple, a smooth single Malt, while pondering their progress and dreaming of future travels. The Earl has solemnly sworn that he will join the Prince in some faraway land to celebrate his French heritage and his charmed African childhood.

 

 

Le dessinateur (designer), who is the Earl’s right-hand man and a girl to boot, has drawn up plans to perfect scale so that the Prince and Princess can get stuck in and design their living quarters. Now, moving around cardboard cut-outs of beds, fridges, dining areas, bathrooms, and kitchens has replaced traditional courtly games of checkers and chess. Soon the Earl will have the title ‘Coachbuilder’ to add to his list of impressive titles.

 

 

Rumour has it that building a royal carriage can cause tensions and disputes in the kingdom, but the fiery Princess, who by birth was a brave Knight, sincerely hopes she never has to use magic powers to make the headstrong Prince see reason. She needs her Le Creuset saucepans, washing machine, fine linens, a comfortable bed, a stand-up refrigerator, and, finally, an excellent shower to remain cool, calm, and collected. Fortunately, she knows the kind old Prince will do everything in his power to have peace in the land. He never misses the bumper sticker "Happy wife, happy life" when she occasionally fires up and zooms off on her broomstick.

 

 

*Fortunately, she still believes in the Easter Bunny; they saw two rabbits using the pedestrian crossing near the Primary School just last week.

 

*The Prince will only be referred to as "handsome" once, as they're inclined to get a swollen head.  We must always remember who wears the tiara in this story.